“Run the Dishwasher Twice”: Permission to Make Everyday Life Easier

Posted on June 25, 2026 by The Orange Rhino

“Run the dishwasher twice.” Or even three times. I saw this in an article yesterday and loved it. The article was about mental health. A woman shared that she was struggling and didn’t know what to share with her therapist that day. I never have that challenge. But I get it. Oh do I get it. Sometimes everything is SO much that you don’t even know where to start. What to say. What to even admit out loud. It is just all too much.

And now Dave Matthews is singing in my head, “Too much to say. Too much to say.” And the song’s lyrics are so uncanny. Which brings me right back to the article. There is an unspoken rule that we should talk about the weather sometimes, right? When we have too much to say?

When our feelings are too heavy? Well in the article, the therapist asked the woman, loosely, what is the one thing on your mind weighing you down? She was afraid, embarrassed to admit that it was the dishes. How she always had to scrub them before washing them because the dishwasher didn’t work well.

“Run the dishwasher twice,” the therapist replied. The freedom. The lightness. The weight lifted. “Who says you can’t do that? Whose rule is it anyway?”

Sometimes you have to do what you need to do to feel good. My life is hard right now. I’m trying to not go there because I know people don’t want to read heavy stuff every day. I mean, I don’t want to read heavy stuff every day. I’d rather talk about the weather every day, like people say we are supposed to when we don’t feel great. And trust me, I get it. I’d rather report that every day is sunny and gorgeous and oh my god, it is just WONDERFUL. But right now, my life is more gray than orange.

So I’m trying to figure out what rules I want to follow and not follow to feel good. Which is why I loved this article. The weight lifted that came with the simple solution. –> –> –> The lovely defiance in it. It reminded me of the day I said to myself, “WEAR the darn jeans that are a size bigger!” So many people tell you not to keep jeans that are a size up. You know, the jeans that “used to fit” before you lost a little weight.

I wholeheartedly disa-friggin-gree. There is nothing worse than starting the day with pants that feel tight. Nothing worse.

And that feeling leads to a domino effect of blech feelings. Start the day feeling as confident as possible. Wear clothes that feel good. I have jeans in 3 sizes. And I’m grateful for all 3 sizes. Life is like a box of chocolates? You never know what you’re gonna get?

Well my hips and my body’s ability to retain water? I never know what I’m gonna get. I want to feel good in my body, in my day. I’ll run the dishwasher twice if I need to. I’ll keep backup jeans.

And I will keep posting content that doesn’t follow rules. Tell us all…lets get a nice little chit chat going… –> What is one rule that everyone says you “should” follow that you decided, “Eh, yeah, not so much.” Do tell! Give us all inspiration and help us feel a bit lighter today. Sending warmth,

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

I’m Tired of Being Resilient: What I Finally Told My Therapist

Posted on May 14, 2026 by The Orange Rhino

Yesterday was a hard day. I finally shared with my therapist what I’ve been feeling since February; what’s been growing slowly but heavily. “This whole repeated skin c@ncer, now high-risk situation has me feeling depressed. It’s growing. I think we need to add it to the weekly topics. I’m tired of being resilient. Of laughing with my doctors that I’ll see them soon. I’m tired of coping. I’m tired of putting on a brave, I’m-fine face.

I’m tired of pretending I’m all good. I’m tired. So, so tired.” And I am. Situational depression isn’t new to me. I’ve been there. Here. I’ve let it linger for months. I’ve fought back.

After therapy, I went back to the couch and promptly slept from 10 to 3. Healing this go-around is seemingly harder. As I went in and out of sleep, a popular thought came to me. Repeatedly. “Depression is a liar.” Depression was trying to tell me that I’d have no energy for days to come. Depression was trying to tell me that I’d lost my groove altogether. Depression was trying to tell me that it would win. Ha!! My mind knows better.

It has learned better. It, I, fought back. I refused to go back to 2016, when depression did indeed win. I started to think… What if… What if I did something bold? Years ago, almost ten to be exact, when depression rolled in, I stayed hidden and didn’t share. I figured my way out eventually and came back online in 2022.

But what if this time, I don’t hide? What if this time, I keep writing? What if I share the tools I’m using while I’m using them?

Because here’s the thing. Depression isn’t always the big “D.” Sometimes it’s a little “d.” Sometimes it lasts for days. Or weeks. Or months. Or even years. And honestly, the tools I’ve learned to deal with the depression I face are the same tools I use when the gray in life hits in general. The heavy, blech moments that just happen because well, life happens. The ones that weigh things down. The ones that try to convince us we are stuck there.

And we all face those moments. Depression or not. I know they aren’t unique to me. Life is wonderful. It truly is. And also, life can weigh us down sometimes. I remembered yesterday — as my mind and I fought back the gray — that it is easier to begin feeling lighter when someone sees us. Shows up with us. For us. Yesterday, my fiancé sent me flowers celebrating an accomplishment I’m yet to share with all of you. Little did he know that seeing me, reminding me of the orange I’ve been working toward, would help me take one step forward.

One of my favorite tools. And honestly? One step forward counted. We are all in this together. When gray happens, we show up. With you. For you. For each other.

🧡 The Orange Rhino

Sending my warmth as always, xoxo, Sheila (Changed the order up today and soon it will make sense as to why it made sense today)

Don’t Let a Disability Tell You What You’re Capable Of

Posted on March 19, 2026 by The Orange Rhino

There is no polite way for me to write this post. I’ve actually waited a few days (and months) so I could be “cool, calm, and collected.” Truth? I’m not sure I will ever be entirely cool, calm, and collected about this. This post is for any parent, child, or person who has ever been told they weren’t good enough because they have a disability. Or because they learn differently. Or because they learn more slowly. Do not, I repeat, do not, let anyone tell you that you are not good enough to become what you want to become.

I have four sons. I’m sharing this with permission. One of my sons has severe ADHD, auditory processing and other learning challenges. He was bullied by students and teacher aides alike. In 6th grade, an aide said to him, “You will never go to college or succeed.” Imagine if he had listened?!

Well, he didn’t. Instead, he basically said, “Oh yeah? Watch me.” He is now at a top college, on scholarship, getting good grades, and studying to become a special education teacher. Because he had a few of us rooting for him, pointing out to him the good we saw in him; his strengths, his opportunities. We believed in him until he could for himself.

Another one of my sons has struggled since kindergarten. In 3rd grade, his teacher told him, “We don’t have books at your reading level in this classroom. You’re a big kid now. You need to try harder. Stop being lazy.” Lazy? I told her to look at the facts. To look at everything else he could do; how hard he worked, how hard he was trying to find ways to help himself read! I said, “He is not lazy. He is struggling to read. There is something we are missing. Help.”

Fast forward two years. I asked the elementary school principal for extra support going into middle school. “We don’t proactively add support.” Right…

Middle school was a challenge. His mental health took a hit; his homework, tests, quizzes, you name it, took a hit. A child who used to love learning, who tried so hard, slowly stopped trying. I pushed again for help. And I was asked, “Are you sure you’re not being a helicopter parent? Overbearing? Maybe trying to get him extra help just so he gets A’s? We see that a lot in this town.”

The fact that I stayed polite at that moment?

Honestly, a true Orange Rhino® moment. Because no. That was not it. I said, “He is masking. He is truly struggling. You’re missing it. I need you to trust me.” They didn’t. They kept insisting he needed to try harder.

And now? That child has an IEP because one person finally listened to me. One person took the time to look beyond the struggles to see the strengths. My son has a learning disability, including a form of dyslexia.

And the testing showed it is not mild. Cue the tears. Cue my rage. Cue the heartbreak of knowing I was right and that it took years to get him all of the support he needed. (I had gotten him other support but what he needed most was in school.) But here is what I need people to understand: A child (anyone really) who learns differently should not be written off. Different pace. Different path. Different strengths.

Still capable. Still worthy. Still full of potential. My boys are proof of that. Their struggles have built empathy. Determination. Resilience. Leadership qualities. Yes, I wish parts of their journey had been easier. Of course I do.

And I know they feel the same. But who they have become because they kept going? Because they had to try harder to learn and to (sadly) prove themselves to the world and sometimes to themselves? I would not change who they have become for the world. Who they are in heart, grit, perspective, and character is second to none.

So let me say this loudly: Let’s stop confusing disability with inability. A disability is not a disqualification. And different does not mean less. (argh!) Sending my warmth and a little extra oomph to you all today and always, and an extra amount of love and support to any parent who knows and feels this post all too well.

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

ADHD, Forgotten Dry Cleaning and the Humbling Reality of Everyday Life

Posted on March 12, 2026 by The Orange Rhino

I was so proud. And oh so quickly humbled. Please tell me someone out there has the same story?! Y’all… the dry cleaning in this picture? Take a guess at the date on the ticket. Go on. If you’re guessing January 2026… Nope. December 2025? Not even close. September 2025. SEPTEMBER. What even is that?!

And the wild part is…I was so proud of myself yesterday. First, I actually did my laundry like a functioning adult: put it in the washer, moved it to the dryer on time, and even took it out within a reasonable amount of time.

Honestly? I felt unstoppable. Then I thought, “Oh! The dry cleaner is on the way to the dentist. I can drop off my winter sweaters and pick up my pink button-down for spring.” Planning ahead. Following through. Managing life. Who was this girl?! The day before, I had even gotten myself to a doctor’s appointment on time by setting a timer, getting up when it went off, and staying on task all the way to the car. Again, who is this girl?!

I was so proud of myself. So pumped up. What the what?! I mean… is this what 48 is? Being genuinely excited that you followed through on basic tasks? Being genuinely excited that you’re finally figuring out how to manage ADHD while perimenopause is totally trying to make everything harder? Because if so… wow.

This is…humbling. Also maybe a sign to put “plan actual fun” on the calendar immediately. (Pause. Doing that now. You know, so I don’t forget.) I’m back.

So, yesterday I was feeling good. Proud. On a roll. I got to the dry cleaners. Got out of the car. Walked inside. And then… Guess what I did not have with me? The sweaters. Thankfully they were still in the car, so fine. Minor embarrassment. No crisis.

But then I asked for my pink shirt… …and she came back with the shirt and four other items. FOUR. From SEPTEMBER. This, my friends, is exactly why I do not do dry cleaning. I either lose the ticket… or forget the clothes exist entirely.

So yes, “pick up dry cleaning” now officially just got added as another task in Google Calendar. Oh Google Calendar task list… I’d be lost without you. Who am I kidding?

Still a little lost over here. But definitely less lost with you. Please tell me your version of this so I can feel less alone. I’m going to be kind and drop a few more in the comments so we all feel less alone. (As I drink my cold coffee. Not iced. Cold.) Sending my warmth and a little oomph to you today and always,

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

Skin Cancer Surgery, Fear and the Relief of Not Being Judged

Posted on February 25, 2026 by The Orange Rhino

I kept trying not to cry. I knew getting upset would make it all hurt more. But I couldn’t help it. I did okay during the local anesthesia on my scalp. I made some weird noises out of discomfort. Wiggled my feet even. Otherwise I stayed perfectly still (kinda had no choice lol) The nurse? No judgement. Just a loving, gentle, “it’s okay, make all the noises you need to make. Wiggle your toes. Hum. Whatever helps you.

You’re doing great.” How nice not to be judged. Next up? Shaving my scalp. The minute they started to shave my head, the tears slowly formed at the corner of my eyes. I willed myself to stop because I knew if my blood pressure went up, it would create more pressure in the area where the procedure was about to take place. I successfully stopped (after a nice little pep talk with myself.) But then came round two of the procedure.

My face was covered. More hair needed to be shaved. Darnit. I tried and tried but couldn’t stop the tears. It was a much bigger area than expected.

When they were done, the cloth was removed from my face and the nurse, again so loving and gentle, and without judgement, said, “Oh, I see a tear.” Before I could ask, she had a tissue in hand and was dabbing my tears away. No, “are you okay?” or even a toxic positive pep talk. She instantly acted, let me feel, and didn’t make me talk or explain. She saw me. She was with me. She let me be me. Such an incredible gift.

Truth is that I was embarrassed for crying. I have had four of these procedures, one even on my eyelid, and I’ve never cried.

But this? This just hits different. I was so appreciative of her in that moment. The entire team knew the size of skin removed was larger than planned. The doctor knows me by now since we see each other every 6 months or so for a MOHs procedure. I’m so grateful for him and his team. Such incredibly kind, loving people. My plastic surgeon and his team were also reassuring. He did a great job. Kept me out of the operating room (which both he and my other surgeon didn’t know if it was possible) and was able to hide most of the scar in the hair.

I will still look different. But it is so much better than other outcomes. And now to go look for the most awesome daily beach hat to wear so I don’t need to keep repeating this little pattern. Oddly enough, I love, love, love hats but don’t like how I look in them.

But then again, that’s how I felt about sunglasses and now I found a pair I like. Who knows, maybe I’ll find one that can be embroidered with a cute ‘lil Orange Rhino?! Hoping you all are having a good week so far, and thanking you for your loving messages yesterday. (I’m still catching up. Did lots of sleeping yesterday and today.)

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

When Life Gets Ridiculous, Sometimes I Choose to Laugh

Posted on January 28, 2026 by The Orange Rhino

Honestly? I had to laugh. The other option was collapsing into a puddle of tears — from frustration, pain, annoyance, and full-on are you kidding me — and it just didn’t feel appealing. Not because crying is bad. You all know I cry. But because the situation was so ridiculous, I was past tears. Sunday night. Nearly a foot of snow. School already canceled. And somehow… I sliced the tip of my finger. You know, the place that never stops bleeding.

I’ve cut my hand once in my life. I’m pretty good with knives in the kitchen. Now I question that. No stitches were happening in a snow/ice storm, so I did what any rational person does: applied pressure, searched for “New Skin” that apparently vanished from my house, ignored good judgment and kept making fajitas (oops), and then texted every neighbor. Every husband replied: “Just use super glue.” Um…I’ve heard of that, but seriously?!

Even my fiancé was on board with the idea. Desperate measures? A neighbor saved the day. I trekked through unplowed snow, glued the finger, applied athletic tape (another suggestion) and somehow made it through without stitches. I’m grateful. I truly did not and do not have time for another doctor’s appointment. And to add a little lightness — I almost did end up in a puddle… not of tears, but of something else. I still struggle not to pee when I laugh too hard.

Now that is one doctor’s appointment I can’t wait to get to this month! Eech! So excited?! (How odd is that?!) Four kids later and here we are. Happy Wednesday. I hope you laugh a little today — and maybe don’t pee at the same time. Sending my warmth to go with your strength, today and always.

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

One Year Without Alcohol: What I’ve Learned About Sobriety

Posted on January 14, 2026 by The Orange Rhino

1 year (and 1 week) of no alcohol. Honestly, I never thought I would be sharing that. I never thought I’d be setting a goal to stop drinking. I mean sure, I gave up alcohol four times during my pregnancies and when I nursed, but that was different. I knew that was short lived. And honestly, life was less stressful then. I didn’t crave alcohol back then. There were so many times this year when I didn’t think I would make it through the year. As recently as December.

“Screw it,” I thought to myself just weeks ago. “I’ve made it this far, I’m just having a drink. I need it.”

“Nope Sheil. Same logic. You’ve made it this far. Keep going. One more day. Have hot chocolate instead. Have a tonic and lime. Rim a glass with sugar and pour in cranberry seltzer. Anything else to relax. You don’t actually need a drink to feel better.”

It wasn’t easy.

Saying no to the quick fix when life got loud.
Staying present in the hard moment instead of numbing.
Being in certain situations where drinks were normal.
Margaritas poolside.
Red wine by the fire.
Cosmos at my favorite restaurant.
Gin and tonics on Friday nights.
Realizing how much I missed alcohol and wanting to feel better (which really meant, it was the right decision to be walking away from it not just for a year, but in general…which really meant acknowledging it was indeed, an issue.)
Feeling isolated in social situations, being the one not drinking.
Or being ignored at a restaurant once the waitress realizes your bill will be less because you aren’t ordering alcohol. (That was fascinating.)

So yeah this past year wasn’t easy.

But I did it.

One no to the drink, one yes to my goal, at a time. And it feels good. On so many levels. Better sleep. Better skin 🙂 Better health. More self-confidence. Only area for improvement? The taste lol. Definitely need to find more options! It doesn’t taste so good!! Thank you all for your words of encouragement and support along the way. They have meant so much. And congrats to all of you in this community who are on a similar journey and also going one moment, one step at a time!

I have a lot more to say on this topic and am curious if there is interest 🙂 It kinda reminds me of another topic I wrote about years ago. A taboo topic where people wanted to talk about it, but also were hesitant too. Send me a DM or drop a comment if interested.

Sending my warmth to you on this Wednesday,

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

A Divorced Mom’s Thanksgiving: When the Holiday Is Beautiful and Hard

Posted on December 5, 2025 by The Orange Rhino

It’s always hard posting stories like this. But, keeping it to myself doesn’t feel right. You all know me — I like to be honest and to fully represent the non-perfect side of social media. I thrive at that. Holiday seasons are full of beautiful family photos. And well… Moments before I took this photo, I had tears in my eyes.

It was the morning of my Thanksgiving with my boys. It was NOT going well. Boys were bickering. And that is being mild. My college kiddo was home. Since I’m divorced, I only had all my boys together for a whopping 1.5 days. I wanted the time to go well. To go smoothly. To be happy. It. Was. Simply. Not. Going. That. Way. It was disappointing. Discouraging even. Was this how the entire day was going to go?

I took a break from the situation. And here’s where my doubt in sharing comes, but stick with me, okay? To be honest, even though it was only 11:00 am I wanted a gin and tonic.

I wanted to ease the pain, the stress, the chaos, the feelings of discomfort. But I’m 320+ days of not choosing alcohol so I chose hot chocolate. It was good, but it wasn’t the same. Did it taste good, but in a different way? Yes! Did it help me relax in the sense that I slowed down, sat and really enjoyed it? Yes!

But did it numb the feelings? Did it numb my stress? No. Because really, that is what I wanted in that moment. To numb.

Here’s the thing…this post isn’t about alcohol and me preaching about how I have chosen to be sober (there are a lot of reasons there.) We all have something we turn to when we want to numb. I have a few. Shopping to decorate the house. Scrolling. Eating. Just zoning out to avoid. This season, when the to-do’s grow (even though they are ones I enjoy) when expectations grow, when kids anxieties grow because of school work, exams, and excitement for the holidays, when the this, the that, when it all becomes A LOT (even a lot of goodness) it is easy to want to numb, a lot.

But I know from years of learning to live with the gray…that numbing only pushes the pain down…down inside and down the road so to speak. It doesn’t actually make me feel better. And so I keep trying to find more productive ways to feel the gray so it doesn’t win in the moment. Not always easy, is it? All this to say… I share this story to simply say, I get it. I get the pressure. I get the desire to escape.

I get the wish to just feel better. I get the longing for ease. You aren’t alone in these feelings (that is if you get them) If no one in your friend group is openly talking about this, know that I am. I wish I didn’t want to numb as much; that things weren’t so much. I wish I turned less to shopping and eating.

But here I am. Knowing it, working through it, and doing my best. It ain’t easy. But I’m doing. Just like you. Sending my warmth to go with your strength, today and always, and especially if you are feeling all the “a lot” of this season, or in general and you are also trying to numb less.

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

What My Broken Fireplace Taught Me About Coming Back to Life, Differently

Posted on November 25, 2025 by The Orange Rhino

I know many of you can relate to the state of my fireplace. On the surface, it is “broken” and unable to be used. The inside needs repair in order to function safely. And yet, it isn’t actually broken. Neither are we. When I bought this house 18 years ago, we decided not to fix it. “We won’t ever use this fireplace.” “The other one is more important.” “The other one will get more use.” “Other things need more fixing.” “We will get around to it someday.” Hmm…sound familiar?!

The ashes from fires built years before? They’re still there. Literally never even cleaned them out. The fireplace sat, dirty, sooty-ish for years. Never used, just looked at. Last year, I moved the dining room into this room (which was the living room) and decided I had enough. The fireplace needed to come back to life, one way or another. It needed to find warmth again. It needed to flicker again. It needed to glow again.

It, I, had enough of just sitting, not doing what it was meant to do. Restoring it to how it originally worked? Not an option. Finding a new path? Totally an option. Hello battery operated flickering candles. Thank you for doing the job! I have felt like this fireplace. Broken. Without flicker. Wondering how I will come back to life and function the way I feel I was meant to. I longed to return to my “glory days” the way I “used to” function.

But the thing is I am no longer that person. Returning to “her” isn’t entirely possible. Even if I could, the return would be different. Similar core, but still different. Accepting this hasn’t been easy.

But alas, here I am. Flickering, differently. Same body, same goal of bringing warmth and feeling it myself, different type of flicker, different way of achieving the flicker. Curious to know…how many of you can relate? Where are you in your fireplace journey? Feeling broken? (So not alone there my friends!) Still figuring out your candle equivalent? (It takes time and yeah, being patient kinda stinks.) Flickering fully? (Do tell! Share, share, share!) Sending my warmth, to go with your strength, today and always and especially if you are feeling more broken than flickering right now. I hope warmth finds you today, perhaps in knowing others in this community feel the same. I’ve been there. I still feel that some days too. I see you. I feel with you.

xoxo, Sheila

🧡 The Orange Rhino

How a Friend Helped Me Finally Let Go of What My House “Should” Look Like

Posted on November 11, 2025 by The Orange Rhino

I had the most liberating, helpful phone call with a friend yesterday. Saweet! It’s amazing how we can know something, tell ourselves something, and yet it takes a friend saying the exact same thing for us to finally hear it and follow through, right?! –>Anyone else experience this? Lately, I’ve been juggling so much (aren’t we all?): parenting responsibilities, launching a company (did I just formally put that in writing?!), being a human, and re-setting up my house after a “kitchen” renovation that somehow took over every room.

Every day, I feel pulled in so many directions. Every day I ask myself, “okay, so what is most important?” “What action will bring me the most peace?” “What action will have the largest consequence if I ignore it?” “What action will energize me the most so I can do everything else a little bit better, so I can go to bed feeling a little bit better about how the day went?” And of course, the answers never match.

Work needs the most. Parenting matters most. Cleaning weighs on me most. Cue frustration, overwhelm, and hair pulling. In my heart, I knew the house was what I needed to say yes to and yet, I couldn’t. Enter my friend. I made myself a cup of hot chocolate in one of my favorite mugs (and not just because it’s orange, but because it is honestly the perfect size!) and gave her a call.

“Girl! ORGANIZE THE HOUSE! Forget work. Forget doing all the parenting stuff. You feel suffocated by the clutter, the chaos, the visual to-dos. You are drowning in the negative energy that every room brings. It’s okay to say yes to cleaning and organizing.” she said to me, all matter-of-factly.

So I did. After a doctor’s appointment (and a slightly embarrassing nap during my echo with a 25-year-old tech), I came home, rested, and voila—one room re-organized, one me re-energized. Holy shnikes, what a difference in my mood, my outlook, my everything. Cleaning, organizing can be given such a bad rap. Focus on the other stuff people say. Cleaning and organizing can wait. Sure, sometimes it can.

But sometimes, oh sometimes it IS the game changer, the foundation that makes everything better. So the question for me is, what will I tackle today?! Hmmm. Good news…the possibilities are endless since there are soo many boxes and dust is everywhere post floors getting refinished!

What’s your version of cleaning the house? The thing you keep pushing aside but deep down know would make you feel lighter, calmer, more like you again? The thing you want to do but feel like maybe you shouldn’t prioritize because of messaging out there that says otherwise?! Tell me below — I promise, no judgment, just solidarity and maybe a gentle nudge to go for it. Sending my warmth to go with your strength, today and always, and especially if you are going to tackle your version of “cleaning the house” today. I’m with you in spirit. Always am.

xoxo, Sheila
🧡 The Orange Rhino