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Whatever you do, just spread the word that

This Thursday May 17^th, 2012 is the 1^st official “The Orange Rhino Challenge Day” one day where I encourage everyone to take a break from yelling at their kids. To try and go 24 hours without yelling at their kids. 

I know it sounds daunting. But I promise you, it is worth giving a try. How do I know? Because this Thursday, I, the Orange Rhino will be celebrating 100 DAYS without yelling at my kids. 100 Days of LOVING MORE. I have experienced firsthand how hard it is too change the nasty habit of yelling at my kids AND I have experienced just how awesome it is to no longer consider myself a yeller.

Here are the details of how you can participate:

1)      “Post” your name to show your participation on the morning of May 17^th in one of four ways: Post at The Orange Rhino Facebook Page (www.facebook.com/TheOrangeRhino) , Comment on Thursday mornings Blog Post at www.TheOrangeRhino.com , Email me at theorangerhinochallenge@gmail.com, or Tweet me at ORchallenge. At the end of the day, Post AGAIN to say how the day went.

2)      Find Support and Give Support  throughout the day by logging on to your method of communication. Feel like yelling? Yell at me. Need advice on how to survive the day? Ask the community. Want encouragement? Seek it from us. This is a day for all parents who want to be Orange Rhinos, who want to be parents who have the energy and determination to forge ahead and parent with more composure and warmth and without the yelling!

3)      Get 3-5 friends to take this ONE DAY challenge with you. Why? Besides the fact that it will help you make it through the day if you text each other and support each other, instead of throwing a 100 day party for myself (and using the money I have saved from future therapy bills for my children!) I am going to DONATE $1.00 per person up to $200 to Habitat for Humanity for every person that participates. Why a charitable donation and why Habitat for Humanity? Well, truthfully, I feel like giving back. I’ve gotten so much out of this Challenge that it is time to give back. As for Habitat, well, if it weren’t for my being able to do home improvements to my house, I would never have had the Epiphany (https://theorangerhino.com/the-epiphany/) that started this Challenge in the first place.

4) Change your FB Profile picture to The Orange Rhino Challenge image to spread the word and to get people asking you about what you are doing further getting you support! It’s amazing how people rooting for you can really help. Go to the BUTTON picture in the right column of my blog and Save As. Then upload it to FB.

5)      Read the Following Posts about what defines yelling and some ways I have learned not to yell to help you (and go to www.TheOrangeRhino.com on Wednesday night for more useful posts…)

https://theorangerhino.com/the-challenge-details/ (definition of yelling per this challenge)
https://theorangerhino.com/you-never-know/ (inspiration to try)
https://theorangerhino.com/orange-rhino-mommy/ (my favorite source of help not yelling)
https://theorangerhino.com/three-fun-alternatives-to-yelling-at-my-kids/ (self explanatory!)
https://theorangerhino.com/sing-my-emotion/ (way not to yell, inspiration)
https://theorangerhino.com/why-the-big-tears/ (way not to yell, inspiration)

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I know not yelling even just for one day sounds laughable. Trust me, I know. I used to yell oh say once an hour, on a good day?! But 117+ days ago on Friday, January 20, 2012 after our handyman busted me yelling at my 4 boys, I had an epiphany; I yell at my kids much more than I like. The next day I committed to going 365 days without yelling. It has not been easy and that first day was BRUTAL. I felt beat up come 7:00. But I did it. I did it. And it felt so fantastic that I was thirsty for more. I knew it was going to take a lot of hard work to go 365 days but I also knew that my kids were worth it. They deserve a mom who loves more and yells less.

After many starts and re-starts I am excited to say that this Thursday I will celebrate 100 days without yelling at my kids.

100 days. I NEVER thought it would be possible. Never. I was (am?!) a yeller beyond belief. I yelled at big things (hitting each other, not listening, potty talk) and really little things (crumbs on the floor, legos dumped out, taking too long to eat). It was out of control, I was not the mom I wanted to be and my children were suffering as a result. Yet here I am, almost at 100 days and I can’t think of a better way to celebrate than sharing this joy with others hence the creation of this day.

You see, as hard as it has been, not yelling at my kids has been the greatest gift. Read here to see how I felt after 10 days of not yelling: https://theorangerhino.com/can-you-feel-the-love/ I feel SO MUCH BETTER about myself as a parent and I know my kids feel so much better about me as a mom. It’s a win win. There is simply more love going around and I want everyone to experience what I am feeling.

I hear often from people that they too want to change, that they really wish they didn’t yell but that they truly don’t think they can change. So this is your chance. Just try it for a day. Commit to ONE DAY of not yelling. It will be a HARD day, I’m not gonna lie, BUT it will be worth it. After my first day I literally felt high on life and I floated around the house with excitement. Excitement for the future. For the future improvement in my relationship with my kids. The future improvement of me as a parent. The future improvement of having a quieter, calmer, more loving home.

So just try it. It took me just 1 day of not yelling at kids to realize that while hard, YES I COULD learn to not yell at them. And so you can you.

“You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no result.”
~ Mahatma Gandhi

www.TheOrangeRhino.com
I can’t yell for 365 days…but I can still pick my nose! 

30 days down, 335 to go!

Dear Day 30,
WOW! I so never thought you were going to come. I mean really, me, not yelling for 30 days straight? That’s a joke. I still don’t believe it. I am pretty sure my mother-in-law wouldn’t believe it either but she would be thrilled. She never really has approved of how much I used to yell. Used to yell. Wow, that is cool to write. Used to. Not do yell, but used to. Sweet.  And to be clear, it wasn’t that I yelled 24-7 but when I did, it was mean. Oh boy was it mean. And the boys cowered. It was not cool. So tonight, I am pretty ecstatic at the progress I have made. I still have a LONG ROAD ahead. A long, long road. Probably more like a long, bumpy, slippery and wicked steep hill. But that’s okay. The drive is totally worth it. My boys are totally, no more than totally, worth it.

Cheers,
The Orange Rhino

*

THE ORANGE RHINO REVELATION: I am not the only one with good ideas in this house, I am not the only one who knows a thing or two! It turns out that my boys do too. I need to be more open-minded to what they have to say because well sh*t they might actually have a really good point and conceding that point could save me from a lot of unnecessary yelling!

This morning #1 and I were in our  normal battle over what clothes he should wear. He wanted to wear shorts and a t-shirt, I wanted him to wear the pants and t-shirt I put out. 5 minutes later he was downstairs, on the couch in shorts.

Me: WTF? I thought we had this discussion?

Okay, no I didn’t say that but I wanted to!

Me:
#1, we discussed this, it’s too cold for shorts.

#1:
Yes mom, but I want to wear shorts.

Me (totally annoyed because I had been up since 4:45 with the baby…):
Well, I’m sorry, you can not wear shorts.End of discussion.

#1:
You know mom, I can just run up and change after the show is over.

Me:
Oh, okay, I guess you are right.

Well that sure as heck was a lot smoother than yelling at him, demanding him to change at that moment. There was of course still a lot of reminding after the shower was over but at least we reached a compromise and there were no tears involved!

*

THE ORANGE RHINO REVELATION: BirthDAYS might not be the same now that I am a mom, in fact they might be out right depressing (read more at It’s my Birthday and I’ll cry if I want to), but that is why I am inventing BirthNIGHTS. Dinners out with girlfriends to celebrate my Birthday. BirthNIGHTS are never depressing and always fun. My BirthNIGHT with one of my friends was tonight hence the no major post 🙂 And it couldn’t have come at a better night, as I got to have a glass of champagne in honor of my BirthNIGHT and my 30 days without yelling. Woo hoo!

Cheers!

The Orange Rhino
www.Facebook.com/TheOrangeRhino 

29 days down, 336 days to go! 

Dear Orange Rhino,

Yesterday you admitted you needed help. Today you need to admit that you can’t blog every night. If you want to succeed at your challenge, you need to be relaxed and rested, not cranky! You need to go to bed earlier, spend more time with yourself NOT thinking about the Challenge, you need to have more time on the couch with your hubby watching Grey’s Anatomy and cursing at Ben for liking Courtney, and you need to take a step back. So today I am forcing you to not post. Or at least not post a full post. Instead share two new ideas you have then go to bed.

Did you hear me? Share and then GO TO BED. Yes I am yelling at you.

Cheers,

Yourself

*

Okay, my two new ideas so that I can get to bed.

I will post “deep thoughts” from the trenches as frequently as I can (hope this is okay?) but when I can’t, I will do one of two things, or both.

1) I will post 1 or 2 or more Orange Rhino Revelations from the day. A teaser if you will. It might be new, it might be old, and it certainly won’t be eloquently written, but hopefully it will inspire you! Please don’t stop following or sharing because of my cutting back. Pretty, pretty please with a cherry on top.

2) As new Orange Rhinos achieve personal milestones, like 10 days!!! maybe 20?!!, I will invite them to write about their experience so that I can share it with you on days I need off. The way I see it, the more we all share our positive experiences, the more we will all be inspired to keep going.

So here we go.

THE ORANGE RHINO’s REVELATION: If I don’t take care of myself, I become cranky. When I become cranky, I yell. Therefore I need to take care of myself. Hence, this post! 

THE ORANGE RHINO’s REVELATION: Don’t Assume my kids are up to no good.
#1 had a pen in his hand. He was standing at my desk, by my calendar. The one I put hours into choosing the perfect pictures. The one with all important appointments written on it in color code for each child. He was silent. He looked pensive. He looked like he was up to no good. I looked right at him and calmly (which totally surprised me!) said “Please don’t tell me you just wrote all over my calendar.” “No mommy, I didn’t. But can you tell me where we are in this picture? I can’t remember exactly but I know we were having lots of fun.” SOO glad I didn’t yell. He was reminiscing. How sweet.

And tonight’s Orange Rhino Inspirational Read…

15 days down, 350 to go!

Dear Orange Rhinos!

Right now, my hands are sweating and my heart is pounding because I am totally humbled and excited and overwhelmed and scared all at the same time about how “The Orange Rhino Challenge” has started to take off. I am so touched that people I know, and don’t know, have decided to support me in my promise to my boys to not yell at them for 365 days. And more so, I am thrilled to see that other people are taking the challenge on themselves. Everyone says it takes a village to raise a child. Well, I say it takes a village and a bunch of Orange Rhinos.

So welcome fellow Orange Rhinos, let the stampede begin! (Is that what Rhinos do?!)

Cheers (or should I snort?!)

The Orange Rhino

*

Tonight’s post is short and technical as this Orange Rhino is pretty certain the stomach bug is headed to her stomach in a couple of hours. Sigh. Let’s hope not!

But, I wanted to make sure to get this post up as I have seen a lot of interest in Joining Me in the challenge and questions about how to do so. So I introduce to you…drum roll please…

The Orange Rhino Roundup:  The time to toot your Rhino Horn about your progress.

Here’s how it works. Every NIGHT (this is a change!) I will post on the www.facebook.com/TheOrangeRhino the following…

“The Orange Rhino Roundup: Toot your Rhino Horn!”

Under that post, please post in the COMMENTS section your name and the days you’ve completed on “The Orange Rhino Challenge”, ie,

 “Elaine: 15 days down, 350 to go” or “Elaine: Day 1, Take 9” or “Elaine: Day 4, Take 3”

The way I see it, you deserve to Toot your Rhino Horn just by participating.

So whether you’ve complete 15 days or are starting Day 1 over again (for the 9^th time, like me in the Beginning), you deserve to post your name for everyone to see that you are trying to be an Orange Rhino. That you are trying to be a mom (or dad) who has the energy and determination to forge ahead and parent with more composure and warmth and without yelling!

Remember, each day is a new day…if you have a bad day, like I did on Day 1 Take 7 (read this post to realize it hasn’t always been a success for me!), don’t beat yourself up like I did! Just keep coming back to this page for the support. I’m getting the sense that you’ll, WE’LL, find it!

P.S. For more ways to do “The Orange Rhino Challenge” with me, check out this page, Join Me.

www.facebook.com/TheOrangeRhino